Okay, okay, I admit that in a previous post I actually wrote these words: “I for one have fully embraced the comfort shoe category. They’re not fuddy-duddy, geriatric-looking occupational shoes anymore.” And I still stand by my belief that shoes in the comfort category can be stylish as well as blissfully supportive.

But recently, as I embarked on an unexpectedly epic search for fashionable yet comfy burgundy-colored loafers (which were on my wish list for fall), I realized that most comfort shoe brands are doing their darnedest to keep me from buying their wares. Why? Because the vibe of their offerings is now overwhelmingly folksy-hippie-dippie-crunchy-granola. Their idea of stylish means criss-crossing lines of contrast stitching, lots of floral embellishments, huge snaps or buckles, and thick soles. And the silhouettes are clunky, making my feet look bigger and wider than they already are. Ugh.

Let me point out some prime offenders:

Taos Dutchess Mary-Jane. I appreciate the padded footbed and rubber outsole, but what’s up with the oversized metal button and overdose on contrast topstitching?

Naturalizer Carlene Loafer. Alright, not exactly hippie-dippie but it looks bulky, right? It has a cushy, perforated footbed, but why all the rings for decoration?

Naot Nau Mai Flat. Whoa nature theme! A rugged rubber sole and too many embroidered leaves.

Next up: the Contenders—the handful of comfortable shoes that made my short list. [Hint: I had to widen my search so I wasn’t limited to traditional comfort shoe stores/brands like The Walking Company, Easy Spirit, Rockport, etc.]